Wednesday, October 30, 2013

Switching to Digital TV

You can’t stop the signal

Television has certainly come a long way.

In the beginning, all the TV shows were black and white (or as they’re called now, “classics”). This made shows such as “Pot Black” very hard to watch because the balls all seemed to be the same colour.

Of course, we had to “tune” our televisions first. This involved someone standing on the roof moving the antenna while another person stood in front of the TV yelling out “No, still snow”.

Later on we got colour television, where everyone turned the colour up to “sunburn”. Every TV show, including the news, became “Invasion of the orange people”.

(We also learned the real reason Pot Black was so hard to watch: it was dead boring.)

After that came video recorders, which let us record one TV show while watching another. And then later, after waiting ten minutes for it to rewind, we’d all swear and curse because we forgot to change the channel on the VCR.

Since then everything has become digital. (“Digital” is a Latin word meaning “impossible for parents to understand”.) These days we can buy movies on DVD or get our kids to download them from the Internet. We can record TV shows on recorders with hard drives that let us quickly delete a show we’ve been looking forward to for weeks by mistake.

And this summer we say goodbye to the signal that had so many of us standing on those rooftops.

On the 3rd of December, those of you in this purple area will suddenly be without your old analogue TV signal. (We don’t know why your suburb is purple, and quite frankly we don’t want to know.)

Most of you won’t notice the difference because your television will be able to pick up the digital TV signal that’s replacing it. In fact, you might be using it already. If your TV can get ABC 2, ABC 3 and ABC supplementary number 36, you’re already on the digital TV network and your kids have been making you get up on the roof for nothing.

But if your TV can’t pick up the digital signal, then you’ll be left staring at a blank screen.

Now, considering ratings season will probably be over by then it may not be such a bad thing. But if you want to make sure you don’t miss a minute of the cricket, the tennis or all those “encore performances” (also known as “repeats”), you need to get in touch with Home Appliance Rentals.

Home Appliance Rentals has a range of LCD and plasma televisions to suit your needs and your budget. And they all have built-in tuners that can pick up the digital signals. Not that you’ll need to worry about that, because Home Appliance Rentals will not only deliver your television, they’ll set it up for you as well.

That’s right! You won’t have to climb onto the roof ever again.

So contact Home Appliance Rentals now and switch to the digital signal. Then when they switch the analogue signal off, visit your neighbours and ask how they’re all faring.

But you may have to yell, because they’ll probably be on the roof.

Maybe something about switching to digital, I believe Sydney is the last to switch which will go ahead Dec 2013! For more info:

On 3 December 2013, Sydney and surrounding areas highlighted in purple will switch off their analog TV signals and switch to digital-only TV.

Tuesday, July 16, 2013

Happy New Financial Year!

Doesn’t have quite the same ring to it, does it? Sure the accountants may well be flinging their pocket protectors into the air, but for everyone else it’s just another day.

The good news is you don’t have to worry about having a hangover or waking up naked tied to a pole. The bad news is you have a major headache to contend with, courtesy of the tax department (motto: “What’s yours is ours—eventually”.)

At first you thought it was your tax file number. But then you realised tax file numbers don’t have dollar signs or decimal points.

Unfortunately, all your appliances and whitegoods your electrical appliances found out as well.

Your dryer suddenly became nothing more than an amusement ride for your clothes. Your television started fulfilling your dream of seeing snow in winter. And to insult to injury, the beer you grabbed from the fridge was warm.

There’s not much point getting them fixed—another few years and they’d probably be classed as “antiques”. But there’s no way you can afford to buy new ones, either.

Fortunately, you don’t have to.

With Home Appliance Rentals you can rent a dryer, television, fridge or just about any other major appliance. Not only will they deliver them to your house, they’ll install them for you as well. (That’s right: you don’t have to bribe your son to tune the television like last time.)

And the best part? If something goes wrong with any of them, Home Appliance Rentals will either get someone around to fix it or they’ll replace it.

So what are you waiting for? Call Home Appliance Rentals now so you can get your clothes warm and your beer cold.

And then tell your other appliances they’ll be replaced as well if they don’t start behaving themselves.

Thursday, February 28, 2013

An impressive chest

It’s February, which means every shop will be stacking their shelves with Easter eggs. (Hot cross buns have already been on the shelves for a month.) At this rate, “Christmas in July” will be when the stores start putting up the decorations.

It also means the kids are no longer on school holidays.

Now any friends who don’t have kids probably think you’re back on Easy Street. No more cries of “I’m bored”, or worrying where they might be. You can just send them off to school and get back to your book/soaps/last will and testament.

But you know it’s nothing like that. Now that they’re home every night the place looks like a pigsty. And thanks to the mountain of washing they’ve left for you, it smells like one as well.

And then there’s the never-ending battle to keep them fed.

It wasn’t so bad during the holidays. More often than not they were out with their friends, and so they were happy to skip a meal or two. But now they’re eating at home every day of the week, and you can barely keep any food in the fridge. It’s as if their stomachs are designed like Doctor Who’s TARDIS.

Fortunately, there’s an easy solution. By renting a chest freezer from Home Appliance Rentals you can start buying your food in bulk—a real money saver. For the first time in years you’ll actually have a freezer that’s full. And because it’s covered in junk like every other flat surface in your house, the kids will be too lazy to move it all to look inside.

Of course, like any other Home Appliance Rentals appliance they’ll deliver and install it for free. And when the kids have finally moved out of home and you don’t need it any more, Home Appliance Rentals will take it away for you as well. (Sorry, but they can’t leave the freezer and take your kids away.)

So what are you waiting for? Give Home Appliance Rentals a call and start stocking up.

After all, pretty soon you’ll need to buy the Christmas ham.

Monday, January 28, 2013

Clothes maketh the mess

Congratulations! You made it to 2013.

It was a tradition Christmas—friends and relatives arriving unannounced to stay the week, being woken up at some ungodly hour to open presents, and eating twice your body weight in ham, turkey and pudding.

But things are almost back to normal now. The friends and relatives left when the food ran out, and the pile of wrapping paper should burn itself out in a few days.

But it’s taking a while to lose the 20 kilos you put on over the break, which is a problem. And not just because you have to re-stump the house.

Along with the latest gadget (iPhone/iPad/iWentBrokeBuyingThisForYou), you got a bunch of clothes. And then during the Boxing Day sales you exchanged them for clothes you’d actually wear in public.

Unfortunately your wardrobe is already overflowing to the point where you now have a “floordrobe”. And until you can fit into them all again you have no idea what to keep and what to “donate” to the pile of burning wrapping paper.

Fortunately, Home Appliance Rentals has the solution: hire a wardrobe to store all your new clothes.

Sure you could buy yourself one, but what’s the point? Chances are you’ll only need it for a month or so (unless you really went overboard with the Christmas pudding).

And if you did buy one you’d either have to lug it home and manoeuvre it into position, or spend the next three days making sense of the flat pack instructions. (“Insert part A into part B, then hit yourself in the head with a rubber mallet (not included).”

Home Appliance Rentals will not only deliver it to your house, they’ll also put it where you want it. You don’t need to life a finger—well, maybe one to tell them where your bedroom is.

And when you’ve finally sorted out your clothes and have everything stored neatly in your wardrobe (or you can at least see the floor again), they can take it away again.

On second thoughts, you may want to keep it a while. Australia Day is coming up soon, and there’s no point letting all that pavlova and lamington go to waste.